Couples therapy is an extremely important investment. Some studies show couples wait, on average, six years from the start of problems before coming in for therapy. But the longer one waits, the more resentment and distance occurs, making it harder and taking longer to repair and resolve.
Couples therapy should also be used as ongoing maintenance - a good tune up is needed to help keep the relationship strong. The sooner you come in the sooner things can get better.
You will learn tools to communicate most effectively and help to repair issues. Your friendship, connection, and closeness can deepen. Overall, the experience usually makes couples feel closer and more connected very early on.
Gottman's Couples Method
I love helping couples and have seen particular techniques that I use work wonders. Much of my work is informed by the Gottman Couples Method that was developed using over 40 years of research. It's one of the most effective communication techniques I have ever seen. Couples learn a new way of communicating that works really well and allows us to repair relationship issues and improve closeness and connection. I've even had several clients report back that they've been able to utilize their improved communications skills at their workplace with great results!
In the first session we meet as a couple, and I get to know what each of your needs are in the relationship. I provide an extensive assessment to diagnose the strengths and weaknesses and together we create an effective plan based on your unique relationship. Optionally, you can also be given an online Gottman assessment link after our first meeting to fill out at home that helps to specifically target where we can be most effective in our work together.
For the second session, I meet with clients individually to assess family-of-origin experiences and your individual feelings about your relationship. By the third session, we jump into practicing the communication tools more so that you can begin to use them more effectively at home. By this stage couples tend to feel relief because a solution to problems begins to develop.
With my experienced facilitation this process provides a safe container for our work together. Couples find that topics that have often led to conflict can finally be talked through. We work on teaching problem solving and compromise techniques. It's a chance to finally be heard and understood.
In most cases, I recommend couples plan to come in weekly for the first month or two and then we taper off as tools are being learned and used. Couples sessions are $250 and last 75 minutes. At this time I only offer daytime hours before 4pm. Our first session gives us a chance to meet and go through everything to see if this is the right fit for your needs.