How to Protect Your Energy When Others Are Angry, Sad, or Overwhelmed by Julie Bjelland, LMFT

Have you ever noticed that someone else’s mood, especially when it’s heavy, angry, or sad, can completely shift your entire day?

Maybe you walked into a room and immediately felt tension in your body, or you tried to support a struggling loved one, only to find yourself emotionally exhausted for hours afterward. For sensitive and neurodivergent individuals, this is a common experience. We often process emotional energy more deeply and may even absorb the feelings of others as if they’re our own.

You’re not too sensitive or overreacting. Your nervous system is simply wired to notice and feel a lot. And while that can be a beautiful gift, it can also become overwhelming without tools to help protect your energy.

Here are gentle, empowering practices to support your emotional well-being when others are having a hard time:

1. Ask: “Is This Mine?”

One of the most powerful practices is to pause and gently ask yourself:

“Is this emotion mine, or am I picking up someone else’s energy?”

So often, we internalize someone else’s mood without realizing it. Simply noticing that you’re absorbing energy that doesn’t belong to you creates space for release. You might try saying aloud or silently:

“This isn’t mine to carry. I can witness their experience without holding it in my body.”

2. Visualize a Gentle Energy Boundary

Rather than shutting yourself off, imagine creating a filter, something soft and protective that allows connection but does not overwhelm.

Picture a bubble or light-filled boundary around your body. This boundary allows love and compassion to flow in and out, while emotional intensity or negativity stays outside. You might imagine this shield being infused with calming colors or natural textures, like mist or sunlight.

3. Ground Your Body in the Present Moment

Emotional energy from others can pull us out of our center. Grounding techniques help anchor you back into yourself:

• Place your bare feet on the earth or floor and take three slow, deep breaths.

• Use the 4-2-7 breath: Inhale for four counts, hold for 2, exhale for 7 (repeat for 3–5 cycles).

• Gently hold a grounding object like a smooth stone, a piece of jewelry, or a soft fabric.

• Repeat an affirmation: “I am here. I am safe. I return to myself.”

4. Step Back or Take a Pause

If you can, give yourself permission to create space physically, emotionally, or both.

This might mean:

• Taking a short walk

• Listening to soothing music

• Stepping into a quiet room

• Putting in headphones or using earplugs to reduce sensory input

You don’t have to abandon someone to protect your peace. It’s okay to support others without staying in the storm.

5. Release What You’ve Absorbed

If you’ve taken in too much, try a gentle release ritual to let it go:

• Shake out your hands, arms, or whole body to release stuck energy.

• Do a full-body stretch and imagine tension melting away.

• Write in a journal: “What am I ready to let go of?”

• Take a bath or shower with the intention of washing away what’s not yours.

These rituals signal to your nervous system that it’s safe to return to calm.

6. Compassion Without Absorption

It’s possible to care deeply without carrying the emotional weight of others.

You might say to yourself:

“I can hold space for their pain without losing my center. Their feelings are real, and so is my need for peace.”

This is especially helpful if you’ve been taught that being a good person means sacrificing your own well-being to help others. The truth is your peace matters, too.

A Loving Reminder

If you’ve felt like someone’s bad mood has the power to ruin your entire day, you are not alone, and there are ways to change that. These tools take practice, and every step you take toward protecting your energy is an act of self-compassion.

You don’t have to carry the weight of the world to be a caring, connected person.

You are allowed to feel good, even when others don’t.

💬 Need personalized support for protecting your energy as a sensitive or neurodivergent person?
I offer one-on-one consultations to help you build tools, find clarity, and care for your nervous system with compassion.
👉 Book a session

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Julie Bjelland, LMFT, is a licensed psychotherapist, author, and founder of Sensitive Empowerment. She is known for developing innovative, easy-to-implement tools that help balance the sensitive nervous system, reduce challenges, and empower individuals to excel in their unique talents. Julie has created a global hub of support, including online courses, the Sensitive Empowerment Community—a nurturing sanctuary for sensitive and neurodivergent individuals—a globally top-ranked podcast, articles, free webinars, and more. Her passion is helping to create a world where differences are embraced as strengths and celebrated. Learn more at JulieBjelland.com.

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